8/2/21

It’s Monday. I had a busy day today, along with a little excitement. Or fear. Yeah, it was fear. Let’s start at the beginning. I had bloodwork first thing this morning. I failed again. My white count did not go up at all and I was afraid they wouldn’t let me have radiation today. However, my second appointment was with my oncologist and he had already called the radiation oncologist and they discussed my case. Since a few of my other numbers went up a little bit, they decided to give me a pass. I barely made it. But, he said I could have radiation this afternoon.

He also went over my CAT scan results from my test last Wednesday, and he said there is no evidence of cancer. I do have a lot of nodules, however, and they’re going to continue to monitor them. I’m pretty sure that’s what he said. I sort of quit listening after he said there was no evidence of cancer. Talk about relief!

He scheduled two appointments for them to flush my port and said to have my oncologist back in Tyler schedule the removal. So, I reckon I’m not going to be needing my port any longer. That was more good news.

So I’ve got a couple of hours to kill before my radiation in the afternoon, so I went to a couple of stores to try and find some compression garments. I had no luck, whatsoever. MD Anderson told me to try Kohl’s, so I did. It was a huge store and I got turned around inside several times. After giving up my shopping, I headed for the exit. Here’s where the chapter on fear comes into play. My car was gone. I searched and searched and searched. No car. Panic settled in and I broke into a sweat. I calmed down a little bit and wondered if I had come out a different door than when I entered the store. So, I walked around the corner and, lo and behold, there was my car. Talk about relief again!

 I read a story, and it was pretty funny, several years ago. It was about a lady trying on Spanx. She got them on, but couldn’t get them off. I remember that story. I thought it was hilarious. Until today. Yes, I became that lady. I’m in a dressing room in Kohl’s. I got this contraption on by stepping into it, as instructed. That was difficult in itself, but getting it off? That was a whole ‘nuther story. I broke out into another cold sweat. I don’t want to yell for anyone to come help me. Heaven forbid! I say to myself, I just need to take a slow, deep breaths, and give this some serious thought. However, there’s absolutely nothing slow or deep about my breathing. Panicky breathing, would be a good description. I sat down on the bench when my knees started to get weak. You can’t take these things off over your head. They have to go down. I keep telling myself that, over and over. After an unholy amount of time, I finally freed myself of this evil contraption, hung it back on the hanger, and vowed never to touch another one of these as long as I live.

I left there and went back to the RV. Got myself some lunch, did my exercises wore my pressure sleeve, etc. Then I got ready to go to radiation. It only took about 45 minutes today. I did the breathing thing and kept my yellow line inside the green rectangle as best I could. The machine knows when I’m not in the rectangle, and it quits. When my yellow line gets back into the green rectangle again, it starts up automatically. I will have to wait until nightfall, but I’m pretty sure I do not glow in the dark.

So, I’m sitting here in the RV and think I should clean my kitchen floor. I get a wipe and mop it with my foot, all while not spilling even one drop of my wine. Just sayin’. If anyone needs a life coach, I’m available.